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remote database error


I am completely new to all of this and looking around for help.If I try and connect any of my local sites to my remote database on this server, I get the normal "Database Error: Unable to connect to the database:Could not connect to MySQL" message. If I change the database to a different server, it works fine.This is the strange part: if I connect using a third party client, such as SQL Workbench / SQLYog, I can connect absolutely fine with all the privileges that I would expect. why should it be any different for a remote connection when I run through the new version of xampp on localhost? I can't help but think it's related to the hostname my local apache uses but I'm really not sure. Nothing shows up in the mysql logs on the server .Does anyone have any ideas? .I went through many resources and also product animation videos but did not find any solution for this issues. Please help me out.

Any help will be appreciated.
Thank you